Another season, another end of year presentation night and another much-anticipated Kids vs Adults Kwik cricket match. Embarrassed by their performance over the last two years, the mums took a back seat and armed themselves with bottle upon bottle of wine as they unleashed that most ferocious of breeds – Competitive Dad!
Invited to bat first, Competitive Dad had no mercy on its offspring.
Offering such feeble excuses as "Well we have to live with them gloating for another year if they win", it smashed the coach’s gentle underarm pies to all parts, taking delight in seeing how far it had hit the ball and then panicking when it realised there were no boundaries and every run had to be earned. Sprinted 5s became gently jogged 3s which became breathless crawls for 1 as Competitive Dad amassed 75 runs. Only Maria Calladine and Rachel Elson showed any compassion, even 'deliberately' getting out to give their children a chance.
With a large total on the board Competitive Dad should have taken it easy in the field, but there was generational pride at stake and a year's worth of bragging rights. Competitive Dad flung itself after every ball, Mr Charles even daring to celebrate after taking a full length diving catch off his daughter Lucy. With the children getting out regularly something had to be done, and so the coach did the only thing left available to him – cheat. The children’s score of 28 suddenly blossomed to 60 in the space of one delivery and all of a sudden Lucy Stephenson was scampering the winning run off the final ball and it was all over – the children had won!
Determined to prove this result was a fluke, many of the Dads stayed on to join in with the children in a 'friendly' hit-about but as the sun set and the sky turned a cloudy orange it was time for the trophies to be presented, and for Kwik Cricket they were awarded as follows:
Bowler of the Year – Callum Hensby-Tuck
Callum had such a good season with the soft ball that he finished it by moving on to hard ball cricket. His bowling is quick and accurate and he took important wickets during the various tournaments he represented the club in. He also fields very well off his own bowling.
Batsman of the Year – Joshua Elson
In Kwik Cricket you have to retire when you get 15 to allow everyone else to have a bat; Josh spent the whole season smashing 4s and 6s, retiring and then coming in when everyone else was out and doing it again. He ran between the wickets very well and never looked like getting out – brilliant.
Most Improved Player of the Year – Livvy Wake
With enough energy and enthusiasm to power the UK for a year, Livvy has been a real star this year. She single-handedly took Boxted apart with the bat at the recent inter-club fixture and no longer has such a wide-eyed look of surprise when she takes a catch or hits the wicket when she bowls, which happens more and more. She has made great improvements in all areas of her game this year, and above all that – she is a diamond.
Player of the Year – Anastasia Frost
Anastasia could easily have won any of the other awards, but she really deserves the accolade as the most complete player this year. She is exceptional as a wicket keeper but comes out from behind the stumps to bowl more and more, and she has developed a great range of shots on the off and on side. It will be interesting to see how she copes with hard ball cricket next year and she should become the first girl to play for the boys’ colts team – she is more than good enough.
So, next Friday’s return fixture against Boxted notwithstanding, that's it for another year. Thanks to all the people who’ve helped with the Kwik Cricketers this year: Mark Paget, Marc Fox, Danny White, Tom Sawdon and Ben Huxley, and particularly Dangerous Dave Digby who has supported nearly all the training sessions magnificently and led some too.
On a personal note, now that I am leaving Kwik Cricket coaching, thank you to all the children who’ve come to sessions and made sense from my inane ramblings about batting, bowling, fielding and (importantly) teas, and thanks to all the parents who have supported their children (and the bar) throughout the last few years and for their kind words on Thursday. Be happy! DW
